An Update on my Personal Life

Hi guys (mostly Jess). It’s been awhile since I last posted an update, but it has been a trying time in my personal life. Blogging wasn’t cutting it as the fluffy escapism it typically serves as for me, and I just took some time to do absolutely nothing. I mean, I literally have been doing nothing productive outside of work – I’ve  been reading a little, but not enough, and I’ve been avoiding going to the YMCA even though I’ve been paying for it since February (I’ve been once).

There have been quite a few things going on, but the most currently pressing is that James & I broke up. We started seeing each other here and there in March of 2013, and three weeks ago we realized, tearfully but amicably, that we had different dreams, different goals, and our lives were ultimately going to move in different directions.

I’ll be honest – it has been really, really shitty. For years now I’ve seen myself as a jaded person when it comes to relationships. I’d been there, done that, and knew I could be logical if James & I did end up leading different lives. In reality, it’s not that easy. I wish there were a “villain” in the situation so that I could have something to be furious about, but there isn’t. We love each other, but we have to move on and do our own things.

It blows.

Moving On

I surely don’t have any hot tips about how to get over a break up. I’ve been avoiding sad music and sad movies. That’s already a step forward – in college I would wallow for eons. I’ve been trying to keep busy with my friends and my family, some of which you can see in the pictures I added to the beginning of this post. My sisters and I took Mom to Dollywood for Mother’s Day, and in 10 days my family & Jess (and other friends!) will be heading to Universal Studios for a week. I’m keeping busy with work, snuggling Sansa a lot, and eating more take out than I should.

I feel like I should be over this by now. Realistically, I know I can’t expect to be over around five years of friendship & partnership in three weeks. I’m sick of the heaviness in my chest and I’m sick of thinking everyone on dating apps is too ugly and too incompatible and too dumb and too shallow to compare (lol). Notice: I don’t actually want to date someone right now, but you know how sometimes those apps are good for a little ego boost when you’re down in the dumps? Yeah, that.

That’s what’s going on in my neck of the woods. Here’s hoping I can get back to light & fluffy ASAP.

What’s On My Wishlist?

As you can see from my newborn baby infant photoshop skills, I’m trying something new! I constantly have a running wishlist – if the website has an option to create one, I’ve done it, and if they don’t, I toss it onto my Amazon wishlist. I wanted to share a few pieces I’m considering – all of which are currently on sale! 

As the weather gets more mild, I want to add more transitional pieces into my wardrobe without fully committing to our Southern heat. It’s a controversial opinion, I know, but I love winter and I’m really not ready to let go and start thinking about Spring. Because of that, I tend toward clothing options I can wear for multiple seasons.

  1. Soft Gold Sandals from Madewell
  2. Tassel Earrings from Baublebar
  3. Embroidered Sweatshirt from The Loft
  4. Embroidered Jeans from Free People
  5. Off-the-Shoulder Top from The Loft
  6.  White Sneakers from Converse

Or check out these alternatives:

February Currently

Rifle Paper Co. Constellations Calendar February 2018

Did January feel like the longest month of all time to anyone else? It’s like a month of highs and lows were covered in a mere 31 days and I did not appreciate it. February is looking up thus far, though considering how wonderful the first week of January was, I won’t be getting my hopes up.

Okay, that was eye-roll-inducingly (not a word) pessimistic.

The only truly negative thing that happened in January is that my car was totaled on the 8th. I wasn’t in the car and everyone involved was completely fine, but it put me in a major funk. Losing the freedom to get where I wanted, when I wanted, and the financial strain, and just overall losing a car I had only owned for a year and a half made me feel extremely discouraged for, like, two weeks straight. Maybe three.

I have rallied since, though, and not just because insurance was finally straightened out and I’ll have a new car again THIS WEEK, but because January had a lot of good:

  • I was moved onto a new client at work, which has reignited my motivation and snapped me out of professional burnout.
  • My baby sister, Gwyn, came to Nashville multiple times just to hang out with Em & me.
  • I lost 10 lbs, and while I know diet culture is an evil hellscape I am feeling more confident in my body now that I’m trying to consciously make healthier choices.
  • I reconnected with my closest childhood friends at a wedding & even though everything has changed in each of our lives, we’re still dumb, goofy youth group kids.

Currentlies

Books: Have you ever been reading a book you knew was going to have a romantic element but then BAM!, surprise, it’s straight-up erotica? That was a little adventure I took in January with Acclamation by Vee Hoffman. I’ve moved back into my typical genre now with Emma in the Night, a psychological thriller about two sisters.

Movies: I’ve been utilizing the heck out of my Moviepass. My favorite movie from January was I, Tonya – I was raised to be a steadfast Nancy Kerrigan fan, but Margot Robbie is an absolute dream and I was engrossed from beginning to end. Another favorite (which I just saw during the first week of February) was Molly’s Game; I went into the theater knowing absolutely nothing about the movie other than Jessica Chastain was in it and I totally loved it. 10/10 recommend.

Television: I may or may not have wiled away an unfortunate amount of January’s hours watching early seasons of America’s Next Top Model, but I also finally got around to watching The Punisher. I’ve overall loved Netflix’s Marvel series, but Iron Fist was worthless and The Defenders was, in my opinion, mediocre at best, so it was truly a relief for The Punisher to be interesting & engaging & – imo – on par with the first seasons of Daredevil, Jessica Jones, and Luke Cage.

Clothes: During the Superbowl, I spent some time getting measured for my actual bra size. Yes, really. My friends and I used data from the A Bra That Fits subreddit and I went from a 36B/34C to a 36DDD/34G. I had major sticker shock and “knew” there was no way in hell those bras would fit me – however, I bought a couple cheap ones from Nordstrom Rack and lo & behold, they fit and they fit well.

Music: I am still listening to a lot of Lorde & Troye Sivan but now I’ve added in some Shura, Hayley Kiyoko, Dua Lipa, Foxes, and other generally embarrassing-to-my-18-year-old-self pop music. This playlist is a pretty solid representation of what I’m listening to. Sad music just isn’t doing it for me lately!

Local: I visited East Nashville Beer Works for my friend Rachel’s birthday in December and I’ve been back once or twice a week ever since. Oops. The beer is wonderful, the pizza is wonderful, and they have darts and mini fire pits and board games. It’s a laid-back place to grab dinner & drinks and I think it’s a little out of the way for tourists to target.

Happy February!